My Favourite Toronto - Cherry Blossom days in High Park

Every spring, there's this narrow window of opportunity when the sakura cherry trees in High Park bloom in a burst of colour. Swarms of people teem through the park, gawking and clicking photos as they take in the seasonal spectacle. And as short as the blossoms last, and as crazy as the park can get, it's still well worth stealing a bit of time to seek out some beauty.

Crowds stream through High Park every year, captivated by the cherry blossoms.

The weekends, of course, are a bit of a madhouse when the trees are in bloom, so I found some time during the week to head in. The sakuras bloom usually during that first run of consistently warm weather, and last a week and a bit, pending any strong wind or rain storms. You have to seize your moment before their gone. Too many people drive, especially considering how transit friendly the park is. The Carlton/College streetcar terminates in High Park, and High Park subway is right across the street from the park. If you were to drive, I'd recommend parking in the nearby neighborhoods and walk the 10-15 minutes into the park. Cycling is also a pretty popular option.

Impromptu picnic - grabbed some roast chicken, cheese, salad
 and assorted nibbling bits from  the nearby Loblaws and shops on Roncesvalles Avenue.

I grabbed some food from local grocery stores (and a cider or two from the LCBO) and walked in from High Park subway on Tuesday late-afternoon. I find the area down towards Grenadier Pond tend to be a little less hectic than the sakuras at the top of the hill near Grenadier Cafe, so I strolled down and found plenty of space. Groups were picnicking, some doing sunset yoga, and a group of adults playing hide & seek tag. There was plenty of space to spread out take in the scenery. Twilight in High Park makes for a very pretty sight. Once I'd eaten, it was time to stroll the trails and snap a few photos.

Cherry Blossom canopy

Sky full of sakura

In bloom.

People take advantage of the blooms to stage some inventive portraits.

Cosplayer photoshoot - original version of Psylocke from "X-Men", the perfect costume colour scheme for cherry blossoms

Picnic in the park

Cherry glow.

A little peace from the crowds.

Tips for enjoying blossom season:
- if you want to enjoy yourself, number one tip is to go during off-peak hours.
- plan ahead: there aren't enough washrooms to keep up with the demand. 
- there's food onsite at the Grenadier cafe, but I find it's better to bring some food with you. If cooking isn't your thing, nearby Roncesvalles Avenue and Bloor West have plenty of shops to help you improvise an excellent picnic.

- remember to clean up after yourself and pick up your trash: you'd think it's common sense, but yet...

- that being said, if you're picnicking, bring a garbage bag just in case the park garbage is swamped. 

- leave the car at home and take transit or bike. Seriously.
- don't be a dick and shake blossoms loose just to make it rain and DON'T BREAK OFF BRANCHES AS A SOUVENIR. You're damaging the park and shortening how long the blossoms will be around to enjoy.
- consider leaving screaming toddlers or your skittish dogs at home. The park is going to busy enough to cause a headache in this case, so why contribute to the stress.

- MOST IMPORTANTLY take a few moments, put down the camera, and just look around you and take in this unique, beautiful landscape we have in our city. Go on, I'll wait.


For some more info on the park and trees, check out High Park's website.

Torontoist has an interesting post on the origin of the sakura trees in High Park as well.

All photos here are mine, and can be found in my Flickr album: Cherry Blossoms in High Park (2013). If you want to use any of them, just drop me a line.

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Raconteurs Storytelling Nights In Toronto - A Well Told Story Is A Thing To Behold

There’s something I love about a well told story: it unfolds in a way that you can’t predict. It could be entertaining and inspired. It could be deeply shattering. It can make you think “I’m not the only one that’s happened to”. It can stop you in your tracks as you wonder what you would do in the same situation. The unexpected is a reason why the monthly Raconteurs storytelling night is a mainstay in my events calendar.

Raconteurs is held on the second Wednesday of every month at No One Writes To The Colonel, a cozy bar on College St. Ten storytellers are selected in advance, based on story pitches, and make up the night’s entertainment. The rules are simple: the stories must be true and have happened to the storyteller, must be told without the use of notes or cards, and usually in the 5-10 minute range. You get a variety of people participating, from writers and professional storytellers, to first-timers who just have an interesting story to tell. The stories can be funny, but don’t confuse it with an open-mic  night at the Chuckle Hut – this isn’t the place to practice your stand-up act. No one wants to sit and hear your disjointed rant or pitch for your business. You’re relating a narrative.

Each event is based around a theme, which is announced in advance, and prospective storytellers submit their pitches to the event organizers. The themes are open-ended enough to create a variety of angles and approaches: “Games” led to stories about survival games, Monopoly, and the dynamics of family game night. “Born Again” had a range of stories from being literally a Born Again Christian who falls out of faith, being born again poor, surviving a bear attack,  and surviving ourselves.

I find the audience reaction to be an interesting phenomenon: we’re an audience reacting to sometimes funny anecdotes, sometimes heart breaking confessions. There are sometimes blips of nervous laughter at awkward moments. My favourite times when there’s a moment in the story, and we all nod in silent recognition of familiarity, of sympathy or shared pain. It could be subtitled "A Night of Truths, Both Awkward and Familiar".

The stories are all recorded, with a number of them available on the Raconteurs YouTube channel. If you’re considering telling a story, take a look here to see some examples of what works. Some recent highlights include:

Based on the theme “MONEY” - Jeremy Greenberg - "The 64-bit Friendship"

Based on the theme “MONEY” - Chris Graham - "Carbon Footprint"

Based on the theme "FIRE & ICE" - Alex Nursall - "The Sober Brit"

There are still tickets for this Wednesday's show, on February 13th. This month’s theme “Fish Out Of Water” should produce some interesting results: "ten true tales about being out of your element. Our theme this month is FISH OUT OF WATER and we’re bringing you stories of being out of place, out of sync, and out of touch."

Doors open at 6:30, show starts at 7:30.
$7 in advance
$10 at the door

Tickets on sale here.

I recommend subscribing to the Raconteurs page on Facebook to keep up to date on themes and event details. There’s also the main Raconteurs webpage with submission and event information.

Raconteurs - a live storytelling event
Every 2nd Wednesday of the month @ No One Writes to the Colonel (460 College St.)

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Brunch at Farmhouse Tavern

Farmhouse Tavern is the type of restaurant you want to tell people about, but want to keep to yourself too.  It’s been open for a few months in the Junction and has been gaining positive word of mouth through friends in the neighborhood. he Farmhouse does a brunch service on Saturdays and Sundays from 11a-3p, and it’s a great concept: like their dinner service, there’s no set menu, with the days menu of “farm driven food” scrawled on a chalkboard. A Sunday brunch with friends provided the perfect excuse to visit.

We settled into the front tavern space – there’s a main dining room “farmhouse” and the private room “Hunt Club” in the back as well. As soon as we settled in, we took a moment to take in the charm of the room. It’s a flea market of knick knacks, with a comfortable indie soundtrack playing underneath the chatter. It’s sunny and bright, with a clear view of a well-stocked bar. There's a noticeable focus on VQA wines, craft beers like Beaus, and cocktails.

I was driving, so I skipped the smoked caesar (and regretted it - LOOK AT THIS THING) and went straight for the coffee, again and again – mornings, amirightfolks? What? Oh, right, brunch. Here’s what was on the board that Sunday:

Typical brunch menu at the Farmhouse Tavern

My immediate question – what the heck is the Mother and Child Reunion? Some sort of chicken and egg creation? When the waitress told me it was duck eggs, soft boiled and then rolled in panko and fried, with some duck prosciutto, I muttered a silent apology to Daffy Duck and ordered it. With gusto.

Once the waitress answered our questions and took the orders, she spun around and headed to the back.

“Our waitress is skipping,” I think to myself. This is a good sign. She returned with drinks and a delicious welcome basket of chocolate chip and cornbread muffins that restore your faith in breakfast pastry and makes regret every mealy franchise café muffin you ever forced down. And that's a thing I notice and start to love about Farmhouse Tavern - that extra effort on fresh ingredients, or a combination that elevates standard brunch fare: the mimosas were made with sparking wine from Hinterland Wine, the coffee was a satisfying Reunion Island roast. You feel spoiled, but it's really just how things should be at their best.

Our table full of, oh, let’s say Twitter-heavy users, almost collectively dropped their phones when the food showed up and we dug in: everything was incredibly delicious. My eggs had a crunchy outer layer, but a soft yolk that I mopped up with a hunk of toasted, buttery bread. The other table favourite was the smoked chicken crepe, with chicken smoked on site and a slice of brie melted on top. The gluten-free/vegetarian friendly mushroom frittata was also well received. The side salads served with our meals were also bright and fresh, as we tried to identify a couple of the delicious veggies – it was watermelon radish that baffled us. The whole meal was outstanding.

The Mother n' Child Reunion - duck eggs, soft boiled and deep fried, with streaks of duck prosciutto, hunk of tasted bread and a salad. That might be a chuck of foie gras on the side.

We lingered for a while, coffees refreshed and mimosas poured down.  We didn’t feel rushed or crowded. It was how brunch is supposed to be: restorative, social, engaging.

Farmhouse Tavern has been around a short while, but it’s made a deep impression. I will return.

Sample dinner menu at Farmhouse Tavern

Farmhouse Tavern is open for dinner service Thurs – Sunday – follow them on Twitter and Facebook for menus and special culinary events. One of the highlights is the F*ck Monday events on Sundays – a schedule of hourly evening specials that culminates in a half-priced menu kicking in at 9pm.

Farmhouse Tavern
1627 Dupont St. (between Dufferin Ave and Symington Ave).
Serving Dinner Thursday through Sunday @ 6pm.
Brunch on Saturday & Sunday @ 11am-3pm.

Reservations can be sent via text to: 416-561-9114

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LIFE IS SWEET, EVEN IN FEBRUARY – Ashley Gibson honours her mother's memory, and shines a light on mental health with her solo show

The prospect of February always seems daunting – the coldest, greyest of months, it seems predisposed to being an emotional minefield. For Ashley Gibson, you add in the anniversary of your mother’s death and it seems like the bleakest of months. But out of something bleak, Ashley has created something inspiring and beautiful, with her first solo cabaret show, LIFE IS SWEET, EVEN IN FEBRUARY, both honouring her mother’s memory, and benefiting the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health.

LIFE IS SWEET, EVEN IN FEBRUARY is a solo cabaret show on February 22^nd at 9:30pm, with Ashley singing a number of songs that her mom enjoyed, and sharing stories from her own life, about the impact of mental illness and her journey back after her mom’s suicide.  Ashley’s been open about her mother’s suicide, and how it’s affected her. It’s inspiring that someone has made an effort to share that part of themselves, fighting the stigma of mental illness and letting everyone dealing with mental illness, loss, depression, anxiety, to let all of them know:  “You are not alone”.

Mental health is something which affects us all – when 1 in 5 Canadians will experience mental illness in their lifetime, the odds are you or someone in your life is dealing with mental illness. We don’t always talk about it, we don’t necessarily know how to recognize, or know how to help. But, through the work of people like Ashley, we can have these conversations and end the stigma of mental health. We can move forward, together.

In addition to the show, Gibson will be featuring a number of guest writers on her blog who will write about their experiences with mental illness, depression, and loss – www.dancingthroughlifeblog.com. 

“Over the month of February I will be hosting blog posts from friends, family and bloggers who will be sharing their personal accounts of experience with mental illness, depression, anxiety and loss. I am so proud of all of these people for sharing their stories, and believe that in the act of sharing we will truly confirm that no one is alone. I've utilized my network to also include posts from practitioners on strategies for dealing with mental illness, as well as posts on working through challenges in life and finding the light and love in all of it. “

I’ve been lucky enough to meet Ashley through my Loser Karaoke group, and she always lights up the room when she sings. Her outlook is infectious, moving, and I’m proud to know her. Buy a ticket, take part in something special, and you’ll be lucky too.

In the greyest of days, Ashley shares an outlook I admire: life can be sweet. Yes, even in February.

~

Learn more about Ashley's #lifeissweet month on her blog - dancingthroughlifeblog.com or by following her on Twitter -@ashleydtl

Life is Sweet, Even in February

Produced and performed by Ashley Gibson, Music Direction by Tara Litvack

February 22, 2013 – 9:30PM

The Flying Beaver Pubaret

488 Parliament Street – Toronto, ON

Tickets: $15 in advance / $20 at the door

Tickets are available at the Flying Beaver Pubaret or online at

http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/325738

 Facebook event page - Life Is Sweet, Even in February

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Day Drinking & Daubing with The Colonel: Beer Barrel Bingo at the Dakota Tavern

You ever have that moment where you realize playing bingo on a Saturday afternoon in honky tonk basement bar, with old country vinyl playing, drinking caesars and eating chicken & waffles with your friends was a highlight of your week? And you smile, like you're getting away with something? Wouldn’t you want to keep going back as often as you can?

The Dakota Tavern started Beer Barrel Bingo, hosted by Colonel Tom, on Saturday afternoons a few months ago. It’s a weekly event, running from 2pm – 5pm every Saturday, no cover charge. 

On a typical afternoon, we pile in with a gang of friends, claim a large table and kick things off with a round of drinks. Day drinking adds to the feeling your playing hooky from everything else and the drink specials are perfect for the afternoon with $6 caesars, $5 pints of Molson Stock Ale, and $5 Wiarton Weddings (rye & ginger ale, the country champagne).  The menu is a Saturday afternoon mainstay of chicken and waffles with fruit topping.  The chicken is fantastic, and there are options for pulled pork or baked beans (for vegetarians) with your waffles.

Bingo is the reason we show up, and the Dakota gives it a country flavour, in no small part to our charming bingo caller and host, Colonel Tom Parker. With his extensive collection of country vinyl playing, his easy going manner and occasional drop of trivia, many a bingo hall would be the better for such a host. Cards are typically 1 for $1 for 12 cards for $5, and you can play as many or as few as you’d like during each game. It is bizarre how quickly you get invested in trying to complete a line on a Bingo card, mentally trying to influence which number gets called next, keeping an eye on your neighbour's card. The winning is sometimes more important than the prize, but the prizes are sweet for those luck few to shout “BINGO!” – records, t-shirts, all sorts of beer paraphernalia. There is a grand prize game towards the end of every Beer Barrel Bingo session – the grand prize in past weeks have included tickets to see Aerosmith, the Dakota New Year’s Eve, and to Elliott Brood concert at the Dakota on January 30^th.

You occasionally look over at your friends, laughing while we wait for the next number to be called out, and figure “this is a pretty good thing we got going on here”. We go week after week, and we think we'd get tired of it, but it's really the best thing Saturday afternoon ever.

Try to get there between 2pm and 3pm to get a table or you may end up riding the bar rail. If you have a large group, the earlier, the better of course, and the afternoon, like the Dakota’s brilliant Sunday Bluegrass Brunch, is kid friendly. 

Bookmark The Dakota Tavern website 

Follow them on Twitter at @thedakotatavern and on Facebook

The Dakota Tavern

249 Ossington Avenue,
Toronto, ON M6J 3A1

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My Favourite Toronto - Riverdale Park

Riverdale Park, at the magic hour during a rare warm winter day.

An ongoing series of my favourite people, places and things about Toronto.

Whenever I can find the time, I love to go to Riverdale Park to sit and take in how beautiful this city is. On Broadview Avenue, the upper part of the park offers some spectacular views of the Don Valley and the city spread behind it. In snowy winter, it's one of the most popular sledding spots in Toronto. In spring, you see people walking their dogs, as they bound and tear along, making you want to have a dog of your own. In summer, you look down at the athletic track and sports fields, watching everyone at play. In autumn, you just watch the trees in the Don Valley burst with colour. The park draws an array of photographers, kite flyers, soccer games, and picnics - even in a flurry of activity, it's a pretty, joyful place, this gateway to the East End.

Riverdale Park, early summer.

There's a perfect little coffeehouse right there, Rooster Coffee House. The espressos and lattes are sublime, the pastries fresh and savoury. You get an Americano crafted perfectly and a chocolate croissant, and sit along the front window or out on the patio facing the park, and do what you need: chat, write, sit and regain your peace.
How do I find it? It's on Broadview Avenue, south of Danforth Avenue, north of Gerard Avenue. The 504 Dundas streetcar passes by on the way to Broadview Station. Take the subway to Broadview Station and it's just a short walk down. There's some street parking along Broadview and there's a Green P lot up by Broadview Station.

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A meal at La Carnita, also known as "I will require all the avocado and chips."

Margarita and a tostada with swordfish ceviche. Bliss.

It’s hard to think of a better follow-up to a day exploring the art of Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera at the Art Gallery of Ontario than a meal at La Carnita. What started as an intention to have some chips and guacamole quickly escalated into full-fledged food bliss.

I’ve followed the story of La Carnita since they started as a pop-up restaurant, serving their tacos at events like Toronto Underground Market. As buzz and business grew, it was a welcome sight when they opened up a permanent restaurant on College St. last summer. It had been a few months since my last visit to – a sampling of every taco on the menu was time well spent – and the occasion of foodie friend @laurendorphin’s birthday guaranteed the choice of an excellent restaurant with great dining companions. Our group of 8 managed to grab a large table at 6:30pm on a Saturday, and the large and lively space filled up quickly by 7:30pm. With long tables and many booths, the place seems meant to invite groups of diners to share a meal.

The menu gets refreshed regularly, but offers a reliable array of appetizers sharing plates and tacos, reasonably priced, which gives you the perfect excuse to try a little bit of everything.  A tempting array of cocktails, beers, and wine are available, but I went with the classic margarita. Or two.

Corn and rice frituras, perfect for sharing.

We ordered housemade tortilla chips & guacamole – dusted with ancho chili powder, making an excellent complement to the sweetness of my cocktail. The corn & rice frituras, 4 to an order and each about the size of a pool ball, and an avocado mango salad were perfect for sharing, ranging from $6.50-$8. Every taco on the menu made an appearance at our table ($5 each). Saturday’s menu offered up their iconic cod fish taco, braised beef cheek, fried chicken, fried avocado, and chorizo, all with fresh flavour and pleasant but not overwhelming taste of heat. The tostada was a swordfish ceviche ($7) which perfectly, indulgently good. Sheer bliss.

Key-lime paletas - pie on stick? What is this sorcery?

The capper was dessert. The churros are popular, but I went with the “paletas” ($4 each). Different flavours every day, but I didn’t quite know what a paleta was. I assumed it was a tart of some sort when I heard that chocolate-peanut butter and key lime were being offered. I was delighted and surprised to be presented with a paleta – basically an ice pop. The key lime was like a tart creamsicle, rolled in graham crackers. Outstanding.

I’d recommend going with a group of 6-8 friends to get a nice cross-section of the menu. While they don’t take reservations, you may need to just get the timing right to get a table, with 7p – 9p being prime time. I’ve had two successful visits and intend to make more. Make sure to browse some of their fantastic Mexican street art for sale as well.

Check their website for their current menu, and follow them on Twitter at @la_carnita for updates on daily specials.

La Carnita

501 College St., west of Bathurst St. on the south side

Sun - Mon 5 - 10pm

Tues - Sat 5 - 11pm

Reservations: None, first come, first serve.

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The “Don’t Be That Guy” Campaign

Edmonton Police launched the “Don’t Be That Guy” campaign in 2010,targeting potential offenders rather than victims of sexual assault - letting perpetrators know it’s not “okay” to take advantage of someone who had too much to drink. It’s not “taking advantage” - it’s sexual assault. If you don’t have ongoing consent, it’s sexual assault. These posters communicate and educate this point clearly. It’s “a rape prevention campaign targeted at potential rapists rather than potential victims”. 

The campaign was relaunched at the end of 2012 in Edmonton, and has proven so effective that other Canadian cities have adopted it, including Vancouver (which saw a 10% drop in assaults), Ottawa, and Regina. Nothing in Toronto yet, but maybe that can change. These should be on every campus and in every bar.

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Movember Challenge Karaoke Toronto

Some of our MoChaKaTO friends

For the 3rd year running, the Loser Karaoke family got together to raise funds for Movember Canada with an event we've dubbed MoChaKaTO - Movember Challenge Karaoke Toronto. Spearheaded by our team, The Mustache Farmers of Canada, we made every effort to make this event a success. Movember is a cause that means a great deal to us - we were determined to raise as much as we could to fund men's health initiatives not only for prostate cancer, but men's mental health programs. We spread the word via social media, generated prize donations, and built the excitement up all throughout November until our main event, Thursday, November 29th.

Loser Karaoke is a weekly Toronto karaoke night (currently at Lou Dawg's Southern BBQ on King St.), that originated from a hashtag on Twitter #LoserKaraoke - it's proven to be a great place to sing and mingle in real life (IRL) with friends I interact with on Twitter. At our best, we can come together on something like #MoChaKaTO and make something special happen.

Money was raised one of two ways:

1) Challenge Karaoke - singers and patrons donations drive the entertainment.

• For $5, you get your name in the rotation to be able to sing
• For $20, you can challenge someone else when they get up to sing, and make them sing whatever you want
• For $30, you can buy yourself out if you get challenged (just in case the challenge is too horrific for you, or you're a big chicken!)
• For $50, you can sing a song off the host's list of banned songs
• For $100, you can sing a song by Celine Dion, the most banned of our artists

2) Prize Raffle - we had an outstanding collection of prizes, from gift certificates to restaurants like Lou Dawg's, to box seats to a  Toronto Marlies hockey game, and a number of certificates for services at Mazz Salon.

If you checked in on the #MoChaKaTO hashtag that night, you'd see pictures of us all singing, dancing, and having an outstanding night. I'm happy to report everyone was game for the challenges and we had a laugh with some of them - that was the only way I would've sang "Gangnam Style", and my apology again to the people of South Korea - and some we just wanted to hear songs we love performed by our friends. 


By the end of the night, we raised $1680 for Movember Canada in one night - a new record, surpassing our goal of $1500. At $564 more than was raised in 2011, we're geared up to make it bigger and better next year.

Facebook Page for MoChaKaTO

More photos from the night: MoChaKaTO photos on Instagram (via statigram)

Thanks again to our Loser Karaoke host, Jason Rolland, and our Movember team:

The Mustache Farmers of Canada

Andrew Boyle, Jay Chan, Joshua Murray, Sean Bolton, Jessica Law

Our team: (L to R) Sean, Me, Jay, Jessica, Joshua (not pictured: Andrew) with our Loser Karaoke host, Jason Rolland

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November 11th, Lest We Forget

This is something I originally wrote in 2006, but I like to repost it on Remembrance Day

On the 11th day of the 11th month, at the 11th hour, take a moment, just one moment out of your day, and remember the thousands of men and women who sacrificed their lives fighting for freedom and democracy during the First World War, the Second World War, the Korean War, the Afghanistan conflict and during peacekeeping missions. Think of those who have come before us and those right this minute, who are sacrificing more than anyone should ever ask. Think of their family, think of the lives that were lost, the time that was lost. Think of the lives that were saved, and of the people that are here because of those men and women.

I choose to remember all this, and I choose to remember my Uncle Lou. He's my dad's uncle, and he was a member of the Canadian Artillery in World War 2. He was from Canada, and he met my dad's Aunt Liz while he was stationed overseas. I think he was on leave in Scotland. Liz and Lou married and Liz came to Canada as a war bride. One summer my grandmother (Liz's sister), and my father came to visit from Scotland. And my dad came to like Canada, and thought this would be a good place for a young man looking for a future. And that's how my dad, and my family, came to Canada, and it's why I was born a Canadian.

Uncle Lou passed away in 2005, and I always remember that, because of him, I was given the honour and privilege of being Canadian, and in the grand scheme of things just being here.

It's not a war story, but a life story. A young man joins the army to fight in the Second World War; a young man visits Canada and thinks it would be a good place make a life; and a young man looks at the poppy on his lapel and thinks how lucky he is to be here.

In Flanders Fields 
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders Fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

- John McCrae, 1915

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YOU GUYS! I KNOW WHERE IN THE WORLD IS CARMEN SANDIEGO!

YOU GUYS! I KNOW WHERE IN THE WORLD IS CARMEN SANDIEGO!, a photo by the2scoops on Flickr.

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Matt Fraction on writing female characters in comics

From Comic Book Resources: FRACTION BIDS FAREWELL TO THE "INVINCIBLE IRON MAN"

I started to realize that if I had a daughter, there would come a day when I would have to apologize to her for my profession. I would have to apologize for the way it treats and speaks to women readers, and the way it treats its female characters.

“I knew that if we had a daughter, because I know my wife and I know the kind of girl she wants to raise and I know the kind of girl I want to raise, she was going to look at what I did for a living and want to know how the fuck I could stomach it. How could I sell her out like that?” Fraction continued. “That conversation is still coming, and I’m bracing for it in the way that some dads brace for their daughter’s first date or boyfriend. I became acutely aware that I had sort of done that thing that lots of privileged hetero cisgendered white dudes do. ‘I’m cool with women, and that’s enough.’ It’s not enough. It’s embarrassing to say, because we somehow have attached shame to learning and evolving our opinions, culturally, but I became aware that there was a deficiency of and to women in my work, and all I could do at that moment was take care of my side of the street.

I've always been a fan of Matt Fraction’s writing before, but now, I’m especially a fan of Matt Fraction as a human being. More of people like him please. 

Do yourself a favour and pick up some of the comics written by Matt, like "The Immortal Iron Fist", "The Invincible Iron Man", and his current series, "Hawkeye".

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Friday Night Live at ROM returns. Also, dinosaurs love gin.

I love museums. I love exploring the exhibits, the fascinating stuff and artifacts of history and civilization. It’s like living out some hoarder fantasy. So what’s not to love about a late night museum party, with some great food, drink, and music? How could I resist the return of Friday Night Live at the Royal Ontario Museum (#FNLROM)?

FNLROM made a welcome return last Friday after a successful run in the early summer. For 8 weeks from October 12, 2012 until November 30, 2012, the ROM opens its doors Friday nights (7pm – midnight) to adults only (19+), letting you roam the galleries and sample some food and drink from some of Toronto’s favourite pop-up vendors. The museum is alive and teeming with a little something for everyone: curator talks, music and dance performances, DJ sets and, oh yeah, food and drink.

Last Friday kicked off with the theme Harvest, and offered up more treats than I can count. Food vendors Fidel Gastro, JK Fries, Waffle Bar and c5 have returned, offering up some fantastic food starting in the $5/$6 range.

Some of the offerings from the crew at Fidel Gastro.

I had a chance to slurp a few oysters from Neptuno Oysters while browsing the Dinosaur Gallery. A number of local craft beers were available to sample at $2 each, including autumnal offerings from Mill Street, Great Lakes Brewery, and Black Oak breweries. Little cheese plates were also available and provided a nice accompaniment to the beers. Additional bars are spread out through the museum, serving up beer, wine, and cocktails, while additional food vendors will be appearing each week.

Little known fact: T-Rex was a sloppy drunk. What do you expect with such tiny arms?

There’s a lot in favour of checking out FNLROM: admission is only $10, letting you browse the galleries (open from 7pm until 9:30pm) without tripping over field trips and families. Even when the galleries close, the party still continues in the various lounges, and in the main hall with DJs playing courtesy of ElectriCITY Events. A welcome addition this season is the use of even more galleries as event spaces, including bars in the ever popular Dinosaur Gallery and Glass Room, and coffee and cupcakes in the Teck Gallery Jazz Lounge. These spaces stay open until 11:30pm.

Pre-historic duckface.

The next 7 weeks of FNLROM look to continue the party in fresh new ways. The theme for tomorrow night is War and Peace, which will include performances form the Orpheus Choir, the U of T Jazz program, DJ sets from DJ KTWC and DJ Jay Sea, and curator talks on war and peace in the natural and human world.

If you’re looking for a unique night out, either solo, with friends, or a date night, FNLROM is the place for you. Get there before season 2 ends, and here’s hoping for a season 3.

Other upcoming themes include:

• A Festival of Spirits (Oct 26)
• Africa (Nov 2)
• BIG Fashion (Nov 9)
• Canadian Classics (Nov 16)
• God Save the Queen, a celebration of all things British (Nov 23)
• Light (Nov 30)

Tickets are available at the door, but buy online to avoid disappointment.

For additional details and tickets, visit www.rom.on.ca/fridays

Follow and share the event on Twitter and Instagram with the hashtag #FNLROM

WHAT THE HELL? ANCIENT WHALES COULD FLY?!

A night at the museum.

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What I’ve Learned While Mourning David Rakoff

I am, frankly, surprised how hard David Rakoff’s death is affecting me today. I’ve been a fan of his work on This American Life, and love his charming, witty stories, as much for the content as his delivery. I’ve fallen off listening to This American Life as a regular practice lately. Just simple, embarrassing neglect really.

I hadn’t really realized how ill David was. Last week, I listened to the audio of the live This American Life episode that he participated in. The story he told, “Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board”, was about his illness and what changes in life it brings, the things he misses doing. And then, suddenly, he dances, one last time, on stage. It was sweet and moving all at once and I found myself tearing up.

A week later, he’s gone. 47 years old. Cancer. And even the thought of watching the video version of David Rakoff dancing brings me to tears.

I think I figured out a big part of why I’m hit so hard by his passing. It occurred to me when I was reading this beautiful post “On Already Missing The Angry Passionate Writing of David Rakoff” by Linda Holmes. As Linda wrote:

 ”…like David Rakoff, you can also be genuine and enraged and passionate about the whole of humanity, even when (especially when) it disappoints and maddens and angers you.”

In mourning, I acknowledge I have a deep, abiding love of people like that, who are funny and passionate and all those things. I find myself drawn to people like that in my life, and admire those who are capable of being all those things. I aspire to be all those things. And David managed to do all that and for that. I thank him for making me pay closer attention to that part of myself. I will miss him terribly. 

A collection of David Rakoff’s contributions to This American Life can be found here. Spend some time listening to them. .

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Spell “Beautiful”

It was my first time attending an amateur strip spelling bee. I was among friends in the audience and we laughed and drank with ease in support of our friend who was participating. The event was queer and trans-friendly, and in keeping with the spirit of the evening, the participants were an array of body types, genders, and orientations. There were 3 rounds and if the participants failed to spell their word, they were to take off a third of their clothing. A no booing and no photos policy strictly in effect. These were the rules to ensure everyone was comfortable, that everyone up there felt safe and not exploited.

Once we reached the third round, each participant who got their word wrong disrobed as much as they comfortably felt. It was, all of it, so very beautiful. Some disrobed to their underwear. Many exposed everything.

The audience cheered, and I mean true cheers of celebration and support.

And the cheers roared loud and I applauded until my hands hurt. There was one participant who exposed so very much, stood there in front of all of us, and the room exploded in the loudest cheers of the night and, in that moment, I just felt overwhelmed with how full my heart was to be in the presence of that much support and unrestrained love. It makes me well up every time I think about it because sometimes we forget how much love we are capable of as people, as human beings. And I wish so very much that more people in the world could recognize how much beauty is in the world, and to celebrate it. Confidence is sexy. Owning the way you look is sexy. Owning who you are is sexy. Never let anyone tell you otherwise.

It’s a beautiful world of beautiful people. We should do our best to keep it that way. We should do our best to let everyone be beautiful.

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Sunday, 10 AM - Turn Left.

It wasn't where I had to be, but it was where I wanted to be. I think that's a good way to approach Sunday mornings.

I've been doing this "February Photo A Day Challenge" that the blog "fat mum slim" organized. There's a list of words that serve as that day's inspiration. Sunday's simply said "10AM". I'm not sure why, but I felt I wanted to try something different other than what would have been a shot of me sleeping normally. I thought I'd give my 10AM some purpose, some thing I hadn't done in a while.I chose to be at Ashbridge's Bay Park at 10am on a Sunday.

I've been drawn to the calmness of walking along the water of Lake Ontario lately. Toronto has a beautiful waterfront and I've found it peaceful to just sit and watch everything flow by. The spot popped into my head as I'd recently found a box of old writing from high school. Back in my senior year, there were a couple nights where I felt I needed to have a good think to clear my head. So I would drive that old Mazda hatchback down the highway, listening to Nirvana's "Nevermind" or the "Singles" soundtrack on cassette, blaring Pearl Jam and Alice in Chains. I'd pull into Ashbridge's Bay Park, park the car, and then walk the boardwalk out to the Waterfront Trail, sit on the rocks and just take in the night and the waves.

It'd been years since I'd done that. Most of my waterfront wandering has been along the west end of the city. With the mild winter weather this year, I thought I'd take advantage and go back to the bay. So I set the alarm, and on Sunday morning, I took a drive down to the park and made that same walk. I found myself at the east end of the waterfront trail. All along the trail, dogs were being walked, kids were jumping from rock to rock as they tried not to touch the ground. I heard the rhythm of a drum and sure enough, two women were down by the water, chanting while they performed a drum ceremony. I thought for a moment of snapping a picture of them for my 10am shot, but I felt it was something intimate that I didn't want to disrupt.

I shot my 10AM shot as I looked back from those same rocks where I used to sit and think:

I had a good wander and snapped a few more.

 

A little more walking and I found this bench, and its memorial dedication. If you sit there, you see the lake spread before you while the sun warms your face in the dead of winter:

It's funny the things you find when you decide to get up and get out on a Sunday.

Another hour of sitting and looking out at the infinite, and then it was time for pancakes and coffee. Which is where I wanted to be.

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Loving "The Joy of Books"

A delightful stop-motion animated ballet of books at Type bookstore in Toronto (883 Queen Street West, (416) 366-8973)

Torontoist has a post on how it took 50 hours of labour to bring this film to life:

Torontoist: Making His Ode to Joy of Books

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Down By The Water

On a leisurely Friday afternoon, I took the opportunity to spend some time in one of my favourite Toronto neighborhoods, Roncesvalles Avenue.It's good to see the street humming with life after the past few years struggling with a lot of street construction that hampered local businesses and contributed to a few closing up. There are plenty of new businesses going up, lots of new restaurant life.

I stopped as I usually do at She Said Boom, a second-hand book and music shop. And sure enough, there was that perfect moment when I walked through the door, and that smell of old books and the sound of Jonathan Richman and The Modern Lovers playing "Circle I" on the turntable combined to hit me all at once. I left the shop with a copy of the novel "The Amazing Absorbing Boy" by Rabindranath Maharaj, and of course, the record they were playing when I walked in, "Modern 88". That's not the first time that's happned there, and it won't be the last.

I walked down the avenue, an unusually mild winter day. Shops had their flowers and fruit on display. A low rider bike pedaled up the avenue, towing a child carrier behind it. I ducked my head into a few other shops, picked up an outstanding latte from Cherry Bomb Coffee, and made my way down to the lake. If you walk long enough, far enough, you reach water.

Winter took the day off, and I found a bench at Sunnsyside Beach to watch the water and world go by. Joggers ran the boardwalk. Cyclists rode the path. I was met by birds paddling in the lake. A pair of swans seemed out of place in the January sun, but there they were:

I was reminded of something a friend said the other night, on a much colder occasion. She piled up her winter jacket, bag, scarf, and all the things required to endure winter. She observed winter takes up a lot of space. Today, winter took the day off, lifting its burden of all the things that take up so much space.

I had my music turned off, choosing to just sit and indulge in the meditation that comes from listening to the rhythm of waves reaching the shore.

Everything flows, everything breathes. It was a good day.

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Jeff Harris: 13 Years of Daily Self-Portraits

Toronto photographer Jeff Harris has been taking a self-portrait every day for the past 14 years, no matter what the day brings. Time.com has a video about the project. Just warning you, he shares everything of himself including his surgery, but he perseveres. Utterly moving.

"The images range from completely solitary, auto-timed self-portraits to photographs inspired by a collaborative spirit with whomever Harris encounters on a given day. Regardless of the mood, location or activity at the center of any given image in the series, they all show a marvelously open and generous approach to both diaristically recording and sharing everything from intimate moments to athletic adventures with a wider audience. In fact, Harris evokes the full range of physical experiences a body can encounter: from mundane inactivity to joyful dives to his body being open on the operating table."

Jeff Harris: 4,748 Self-Portraits and Counting

This video came to light via the Metro Morning program on CBC Radio One.Visit jeffharris.org to see the project in its entirety. Harris also has an interactive Journal  that allows readers to submit writing about a day from their life. Their stories are juxtaposed with his self portrait from that same day.

Read more: http://lightbox.time.com/2012/01/03/jeff-harris-self-portraits/#ixzz1icGBXGix

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The year to come, or "Screw you Mayans"

First post of 2012. And, as it's on my resolutions to try to start posting on here again, the first of many I hope.

I'm going to work on being a bit more productive on here. I've been focusing on my worklife a bit more recently, but I miss this blog. So yeah, I think you'll see me on here more often.

If I had any resolution advice, it would be this:

1) Keep it achievable

Got a goal? Great! How do you plan to get their, wishing? Make a plan, break that goal into achievable small steps.

2) Don't take on too much too soon.

Ever make that resolution to hit the gym, then jump in to 3 sessions a week and give up by March? If you don't have a great track record, start slow and build up. If it's a gym program, start once a week. You'll start to feel good after a few weeks and start going more often. If it's to learn to cook, don't jump straight to stuffing a chicken. Start with the basics. A goal broken down into small parts is more likely to be completed.

3) Blab about it

We feel obligated to reach our goals if you publicize and talk about them. It makes us accountable.

4) Don't do ALL the things at once.

Related to #2, but if you have more than one resolution, who says you need to do them all right from the start of the year. Set a resolution or goal for each month or each quarter of the year. Incremental change can add up and is easier to achieve.

I've never been a self-help book guy, but if there's one book I think I'm going to be using a lot this year to reach goals, it's Nerdist Way, The: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life). It's a productivity book for creative nerd brained people. You know that part of you that obsesses about beating a video game or collecting things or obsessing over fantasy leaques? Why can't you apply that to the real world and gamify your life so you can view life-goals as levels, bosses, and achievements? It's written by comedian/podcaster Chris Hardwick (aka Nerdist), who has done a remarkable and inspiring job of getting his shit together from his days as a drunk slovenly former MTV gameshow host to a man doing what he loves, feeling good about himself, and providing a platform, be it book or podcast or Nerdist.com, for others to succeed.



I've chatted about it before, and you don't need to take the whole thing as "a program", but there's some great things in there about dealing with anxiety and panic attacks, ignoring self-doubt, how to map your goals, how to realistically get there, time management and finances. You take away from it the parts you find relevant. There are 3 sections: Mind, Body, and Time, but taking a browse through chapter headings may give you a clearer idea what it's about:

• RPG Your Life
• Seize Your Inner Monologue
• Choo-Choo-Choosing
• Body: The Getting Off Your Butt Part
• Becoming An Evil Genius

I've come to listen to Chris Hardwick through the Nerdist podcast, and his humour, enthusiasm, and his passionate "life is pretty amazingly phenomenal when you get off the couch and TRY" approach to life comes through his book.

I've got a notepad I'm going to work on this week, figure out what version of myself I want to be in the coming year and how to reach that place. I'll share some of that up here (see #3), some of it I won't.

Let's make it a good year.

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